Tuesday, January 14, 2014

All Press is Good Press

I'm trying very hard to connect with old friends. I've spent my whole night Facebook friending old acquaintances from high school fifteen years ago, college friends from ten years ago, or new friends that have developed the last couple of years. What I'm trying to do is paint with a broader brush when it comes to my writing, when it comes to my Epilepsy and awareness.

I'm trying to share my story with as many people as possible. I'm sure that most of you are trying to do the same. A persons story is very, well, personal, but what I'd like to do is bring my illness to the forefront.

I want this blog to be a soapbox on which to stand and shout the thoughts running through my brain. It's easy to communicate these emotions to a loved one (slightly), but it's completely different to expel these feelings to the sudo-public.

I want this blog to be known, I want it to be shared, talked about, discussed, and gossiped about. All my press is good press.

Monday, January 13, 2014

Monday Morning Status

Last night while watching television with Sara, I walked into the kitchen and felt as though I was in a dream. Of course, I knew what was happening, and to be honest, I knew it was coming all day. I felt the little "ticks" where I lose the split second of time that I always talk about.

Once I reached the kitchen table, I sat down and waited for the seizure to wash over me. I felt my eyes getting dim, as Sara grabbed the VNS magnet from my right hand that was becoming numb. She swiped it over my chest several time to activate the device.

That's all I remember, and in fact, when I woke up this morning I thought it had been all a dream. I called Sara on her lunch break to ask her what happened... "Did I have a seizure last night?" She said that I head tilted to the right, my right arm started to stiffen, and I was babbling incoherent words.

Now I can expect as least two more seizures within the next couple of days; that's how my seizures work, they come in three's. The first one rocks my world and the next couple usually knock me out of the bad mood that usually comes with the first seizure.

That's the thing though... I feel great. I did start the new antidepressant, Geodon a couple weeks ago. Maybe it's doing it's job better than Abilify.

All I can say today is that I'm happy I thought it was all a dream when I woke up because the knowledge that I had a bad seizure does depress me. I just think to myself that I was doing so good, and just maybe this is the start of a long streak of being seizure-free. Not today, I feel strong, even with the knowledge that I'll probably have a bad week. What I'm going to do is be conscious of my health, drink some tea, and watch a movie that makes my laugh out loud.