Sadly, we knew the procedure at the ER far too well due to me being in the ER more times than I'd like to remember. We waited a long while before the doctor could check her out and give her some muscle relaxers and recommended some over-the-counter pain meds. She's sleeping well, but he said the pain will only get worse in the next couple of days. This means I'm going to be her caregiver as opposed to her being mine, which is usually the case.
I haven't had a seizure for what's going on 25 days. This is very unusual, and I'm not used to it. I can say honestly that it has me both worried and relieved. Worried that the "big one" is just around the corner, and relieved that it's possible for me to have gone this long without a seizure.
I'm not sure what I'm doing different, but I'm grateful that my brain has calmed down this summer. Last summer I was having 3+ a week while trying a new medication, so my doctor at Northwestern switched me to a "last resort" medication called Felbatol. Of course, I'm still taking three other epilepsy related meds with it, but Felbatol was banned in America for awhile because some doctors in the UK believed it could cause liver damage. I haven't had any problems that my doctor told me to watch out for, but on the higher dose he had me on at first caused paranoia and severe anxiety. This is a major reason I'm also taking an anti-anxiety drug. That, and some of my other pills can, and have, caused some psychological damage.
I know of epilepsy patients that don't experience these sorts of side effects but I guess I'm prone to them and have had to learn how to combat them through therapy. It's very hard, but I've managed to stay out of the psych unit of the ER for nearly a year now.
So, hopefully I stay seizure-free for the upcoming weekend where Sara needs me the most. The last thing our small family needs right now are two sick people wandering about, wondering when our luck will get better. For now I'm going to try to be strong, and be the man I know I'm able to be.
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